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i'm not here - this isn't happening - last entry / next entry - In the beginning 145 | 2001-10-31 9:50 a.m.So here I am! I'm at work right now and excited about this online diary. It will be so much easier than getting out my dingy little notebook every time I want to write. It's so effective that I've only written in it once in the last 6 months. I used to be so much better. Every day! But anyway, I'm already buzzing on my diet dew, and the day is going to be long. I'm dressed as a tapdancer today for Halloween. I put on the fishnets and remembered what I used to look like in them. Ahh, to get my old body back. I guess it's good that I still fit in all these dance clothes. That's a start. But I want the thinner hips and thighs back! One pro: I still have a thin waist. How did I manage that? It could be a lot worse, I suppose. I could look like my grandmother. I will NEVER be that big. I find it impossible to fast. I'm just not built for it. I love food too much too. R and I went food shopping last night, and it was just so easy to think about eating all this food, and I'll never lose weight this way. I can only exercise so much, and it looks like my body is going to give up any weight at this rate! I'm rambling. And not even about anything good. Okay. So I need to get back into dancing. I've been thinking about it for months but not done anything. Working full time and going to night school doesn't help. Plus my part time job! Ahh! I wish things were easy and that I could get everything that I want........ Yeah, right. I'm getting bored, that means I really need to get to work. Deserve some of that money that they give me. Onto the flavor lab........ Listening to:
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