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I just feel really alone.

I'm in a strange place. I want to go to the gym and work my ass off. Literally?

But I want to go home and cuddle.

Or maybe just sit outside and rot?

I don't know. I have FINALLY dug out my desk, and most of the papers are gone. There is actually a desk here now, as well as a filing cabinet and a book shelf. They used to be places to put other things. Well, the book shelf still is. They MAKE SENSE NOW.

If only I did.

I'm lonely.

I'm reading all these great journals by people on diaryland. I want to know them. I feel like I do. But I'm really not a part of their lives.

How bizarre it all is.

I will have to think about it while I'm running.

I want to just go to sleep. I don't think my Zoloft is doing its job.

I've had three bottles of water today. It is so dry. I won't be able to run, I'll have to keep running to the bathroom.

SOmething just isn't right.... I can't put a finger on it.

No music today. I'm sick of all my cds. I didn't listen to Radio 1 either. Fridays aren't as good as the rest of the week.

I don't want to do anything.

Just sit here.

And stare.

At you.

WHAT SHOULD I DO?!

Now seems a really good time for a joke. I don't know any. A man walked into a bar. Ow. Well, whatever.

I have this coffee can sitting on my bookshelf. It was lodged in my chimney at home. The chimney people had to come and get it out. They gave me the can and I brought it to work so people could put their cig butts in there. But no one has needed it. It's amazing - 10 of us and no one smokes. Well, except C, socially.

I think J is really upset with me.

I'm so unproductive.

I deserve to rot.

>sigh<

Well, have a good weekend non-readers. I wish you existed.

Listening to:
Thinking:
Weight:

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My current state is:

recent entries:

Bah - 138 07.19.08
Losing control - 135 07.11.06
Spa weekend - 132 07.03.06
Drinking too much - 134 06.27.06
Okay weekend - ??? 06.26.06